Bl**dy School!!!

Well Little Prince's school aren't as supportive as I thought they were. At the moment it feels like they were just paying lip service to me, with their 'caring' attitudes. I've even cried in public, something I DON'T do!!!

It all started when I went to collect Little Prince for his lunch. I arrived early (I thought) but the kids had already gone in to lunch. As I'd told Little Prince I'd see him at lunchtime, I told the secretary that I'd just pop to the dining room and see him (she seemed to pull her face, but I ignored it). In the dining room Little Prince was just lining up with his tray ready to get his lunch, I went over to him told him what a big, clever boy he was and how proud I was of him and that I'd see him later. He became clingy and said he wanted to come home with me, so to avoid that as he'd seemed happy moments before, I said I'd stay with him while he had his lunch. No problem, I thought. Trouble is the dinner lady DID think there was a problem, and called me over and told me I was causing his problems, he was fine till he saw me, that I shouldn't keep bringing up his adoption issues he was just like the other kids. I was VERY upset by this, but after explaining and her not listening I told her I didn't care what she thought I was doing what I felt best for my son and went back to Little Prince. I noticed her go and have an indepth conversation with the other dinner lady and with the classroom assistant. I was then told that the classroom assistant/nursery teacher wanted a word with me. Told Little Prince I had to go and chat to Miss and said I'd see him again in a minute, pointed out he was with all his friends and that he would have loads of fun. Miss then told me how I should trust them to look after Little Prince and that I should know that if he was upset they would ring me. During this conversation the (berating) Dinner Lady came in and in a very snarly voice and face like thunder, said he's crying now and not eating his lunch. I just snapped and I shouted that I supposed that was my fault too, and stormed off to find his comfort blankie. His bag was not in the cloakroom and Miss had to help me find it in the classroom storage box. She pointed out that his blankie was still in his bag and that he had managed with out it all morning. She and the main class teacher then carried on in the same vein - I should trust them to know what is best, all kids are like this, all kids struggle to get used to the longer day but also kept saying that as his mum I knew him best! So if I know him best and I know how he is feeling, how come they don't trust me when I say he is struggling?? They also said that the double seperation from me was tiring for Little Prince and upsetting him. And despite the fact that he is upset and each and every morning that I should think hard about going each lunchtime. I ended up in tears during this conversation, highly embarassing :-(

We then found out that Little Prince had gone out to the playing field another way and not through the classroom. Miss insisted on taking me to say goodbye to him, as I'd told him I would. He was sat with Dinner Lady, with a tissue in his hand, and had obviously been crying. This is them letting me know he is ok??? When he saw me he again started to cry and cling and say he wanted to come home. I gave him his blankie and had to push him to go and play with his friends, Miss had to accompany him. By the time I was back in the car I could see him playing, but still with blankie and Miss with him.

Once home I rang Mr Messy and ranted at him. He in turn rang the school and ranted at the head. She then rang me to find out what the Dinner Lady had said and said she would deal with it, as she felt that was inappropriate behaviour on the Dinner Lady's behalf. She has now said that I should ring up at 12noon and see how Little Prince is, and if he is ok leave him. The trouble is (and I pointed this out to her!) he will hold everything in while he is at school and fall apart once he's home. I also pointed out the improvement in his attitude to school, and the lessening of his morning anxiety now that he was coming home for lunch. I said I would discuss the situation with Mr Messy and let her know what we decide, which I found out later is exactly what Mr Messy had told her!!!

Now I don't know what to do. I know that Little Prince finds it next to impossible to hold it together for a full school day. But school aren't supportive of me carrying on bringing him home for lunch, and teachers are human - if they are irritated with me (and they obviously are) they could transfer that feeling to how they treat Little Prince. It is a VERY small school with less than 10 staff, so they will all chat and gossip and have obviously decided between themselves that I'm unreasonably over protective and am making Little Prince act the way he does, due to my anxieties not his. Yesterday I felt school was so nurturing and supportive, and now I feel that they are ranged against me and trying to force me to do something I don't feel is in Little Prince's best interests.

I think I'll join him in saying I HATE SCHOOL :-(