What do I do??

I've written before about the Dinner Lady who decided she knew best and that I was causing Little Prince to have issues! And ever since this 'intervention' I have been bringing Little Prince home for the whole lunch hour, and taking him back to school at the beginning of Afternoon lessons. I've always considered this to be a temporary, settling in measure, but now I'm not so sure!

Mr Messy, Little Miss Sensible and Fraulein all walked up to church earlier and crossed paths with Dinner Lady's eldest child. This child went through school with my elder two, and is now in college with Fraulein - child came round to chat to Fraulein about college and agreed to 'mentor' her. Well today child was walking down the opposite side of the road, with no traffic and no earphones plugged in, but completely ignored the greetings called out by my family. Odd but maybe child was distracted? After the service when walking back home again, they again saw child, who this time crossed over the road to avoid them (the side child crossed to doesn't even have a pavement) and again blanked the whole family. Fraulein was nearly in tears as she hadn't realised what had been going on and I am furious! For this child to act like this, Dinner Lady MUST have said something - breaking confidentiality. I have not said a word to any other parents (or friends in the village) about my misgivings surrounding her views on Little Prince, but she has obviously been badmouthing me to her family. How on earth can I let Little Prince stay at lunchtimes when he is ready, under this woman's 'care'???

It is the only school in the village. Taking him to a different school in the area, would set back his settling in and take him away from his group of friends (they've been together for a year and a half in nursery and in Mum's n Tot's before that). He would end up being the 'odd one out' in the village if he didn't go to the same school as everyone else, and given the close knit atmosphere of the village that would be social suicide. When he is confident and settled he is a very sociable little lad, so homeschooling him would detract from that and again make him the 'odd one out'. I have no idea what to do!! I don't even know if/how to raise this with school - should I?? Its something that happened outside of school so is it really something they need to know about/deal with?? It could be explained away and dismissed very easily by the school (and Dinner Lady) and give them even more ammunition in labeling me a neurotic mother.

So I'm totally upset. Don't know what to do. And don't know if there is anything I can do :-(