Sunday, 30 November 2008
Black Kids in White Houses
Follow this LINK to a fantastically thought provoking article on transracial adoption. It has both scared and worried me about our impending adoption, and got me seriously wondering if we are doing the right thing. We are bringing a black child from Ethiopia to live in a rural English village where you can count the number of ethnic minority families on one hand. I think having a family is much better than growing up parentless in an orphanage, but growing up in a black family or a white family in a much more diverse area would be a lot better for her too. We can't offer that. We are going to have to work extremely hard to build and maintain connections with the black (and hopefully the Ethiopian) community around us. I am going to have to step out of my comfort zone and be the uncomfortable one - why should a child constantly have to bear that burden. One that she hasn't chosen or asked for, we are the ones making the choices and we should be the ones bearing the brunt of the consequences of those choices. I just hope that somehow we can make this work for both our not (yet) so obviously transracially adopted Little Prince and our future Ethiopian daughter.
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OUR ETHIOPIAN ADOPTION TIMELINE
OUR CHINA ADOPTION TIMELINE
Formally withdrew from the China Adoption Programme 17th July 2008
8 comments:
I don't post much but have really enjoyed your following your journey. Not a little bit because of the difference in your experience from mine, as we are an hour north of New York city, although we are a bit in the country.
Don't panic, you'll be great, I kind of feel it. Diversity is important but listening and giving respect are much more important. You'll probably have to do some educating of her teachers and family friends but most people are very happy for any information you can give them.
Your family will be lovely.
Hi Kristine,
Thank you for your comments :-) I enjoy following your blog too, your son is gorgeous :-)
I appreciate your thoughts on diversity and respect, especially as you are obviously having to work hard for your little boy and know what you are talking about.
As to the differences in process in the UK and US, I sometimes really wish we had an agency to hold our hands and guide us through the processes!
Best wishes and hope you had a good Thanksgiving
Love
Janet
Interesting article Janet. I think the fact that you are so aware and concerned means you will do your very best, but I do understand your worries. Will drop you an email later.
love WL xx
Hi WL,
Thank you for that :-) It certainly has made me determined to work harder for our new little one.
Looking forward to hearing from you.
Love
Janet
xxx
so good to hear that all is happening!!!!
xxx
s
Hi S,
Its very exciting and very scary at the same time! Glad to see your renovations are coming along nicely :-)
Love
Janet
I must read that post!
Hi Meredith,
I think it should be required reading for transracial adopters, its certainly very thought provoking.
Love
Janet
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