Wednesday

After yet another quiet morning, me and Princess Lollipop are just getting ready to go to OUR shop. Mr Messy will be looking after Princess Lollipop for the afternoon, so that I can take Little Prince to his ADHD Assessment appointment. We've been told to allow up to three hours for the assessment to take place - I have no idea what they are going to do!! Which will no doubt wind Little Prince up, as he gets worried if he is doing something new and doesn't have an idea about what will happen! Well at least if he is wound up they will see him at his most hyped up!!

I'm known/suspected for a long long time that Little Prince has ADHD, and have more or less come to terms with the fact that he will need medication to be able to meet his potential. Now its so close to probably happening I'm feeling scared. Doubting myself, my parenting abilities and the decision I'm probably going to have to take. ADHD medication is very powerful and has quite a few possible side affects (raising blood pressure, suppressing appetite and growth and sleep disturbances) are the benefits going to be worth taking these risks with my precious boy? And then there is the widespread view that ADHD medication is used by inadequate parents to control their unruly kids and is handed out by GPs like Smarties. I'll be faced by this sort of prejudice if people realise he is on the medication. Then again the "mums at the school gate" already view me as an inadequate parent who is raising a mini hooligan! So it can't get much worse lol. I'm also worried about the medication changing Little Prince too much, he has such an enthusiasm for everything and I don't want to loose that part of him, just to be able to direct his boundless energy to more constructive activities and for him to be able to reach his true potential at school.

I talked to a teacher friend last night, who reassured me that from what she's seen of Little Prince it is his lack of impulse control that's the problem, and not my parenting - I needed that and it did help. Thank you :-) I'll hold onto that thought as I'm facing the most difficult decision of my parenting so far.