Wednesday 20 February 2008

Probably the END

We got back late last night from a lovely trip to see LMS at her university. We managed to have lunch together and then spend most of the afternoon with her too, which included taking her to the supermarket to stock her up, despite her protests!!

As soon as I'd got an already zonked Little Prince to bed, I checked my computer and got the shock of my life on one of my yahoo groups. It seems that UK adopters who try to change from NSNs to SNs will only get their referral 2-3 months (or 3-6 months from a slightly different source) faster than they would if they stay in the NSNs programme. When the wait is looking to exceed 5 years, that doesn't make a hell of a lot of difference!!! The source of this info is adamant that it is because the UK declined to sign an agreement with China - bloody typical of our govt!!

I feel like I've been kicked in the stomach. I couldn't sleep last night, and then couldn't wake up this morning. I've been ratty with Mr Messy (working from home to recover from the mammoth drive yesterday) and the kids and keep crying. We can't carry on with this adoption given the facts we have available. It just will not work. I am going to contact one or two people in the adoption world tonight to see if they can say anything to refute this latest news, but am having to face up to the fact that MeiMei will never exist except in my heart.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh no :( I'm not going to ring you in case I cry too. Wait until you have more information, it's only one source that you've found this out from, find out more.

Lots and lots of HUGE hugs

Baby Sis
xxxxxxxxxxxx

Janet said...

I'm just about to (finally!!) post your birthday card. I'm trying my best to find out more. I'll let you know.
Thank you for the hugs - I really need them.
Lots of love
Janet
xxxxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Hang in there Janet! As your sister says, check other sources before making any final decisions.
We'll be praying for you!
Cabbage Queen, Iowa Farm Boy and Computer Geek

Janet said...

Thank you Cabbage Queen (and the boys)
I've been looking into it and its not looking too hopeful. I've a couple of leads to try, to see if I can get any concrete info, and I won't give up till we hear from them. But I'm already looking into other options, and trying to move forward.
Take care
Love you loads
Janet
xxxx

Rosie said...

OH Janet.I read this aswell and thought of you.
How awful and heartbreaking.Don't make any decisions yet as I believe our referral will come next year and yours in 2010.The worst case is 2011.I know thats bloody four years and its hard but we've managed over 15 months so far and it has gone quick.
Hang in there.

Whatshername's Mummy said...

Oh Janet
Mei Mei will exist in more than your heart, just maybe not in the form that you anticipated.
Big hugs from me and sloppy, snotty kisses from A,
K xxx

Anonymous said...

Dont give up yet! Hope fully things can get clarifed properly!

Thinking of you. Big hugs

Love s

Janet said...

Hi Rosie,
Thanks for your encouragement (as always). I'm not so convinced our referral will happen that 'quickly' and as we are only 6 months into our mammoth wait, we aren't that keen on another 3 1/2 - 4 years on top of that!!
We are totally committed to adopting again, just not sure that it will be from China.
Lots of love
Janet
xxx

Janet said...

Hi K,
Thank you for your kind words - and thank you A for the sloppy, snotty kisses (they are the best sort lol). MeiMei (probably should say Little Sister now) will be part of our family, she just probably won't be Chinese.
Lots of love
Janet
xxxx (not snotty ones!!)

Janet said...

Hi S,
I'm not giving up till I have all the info I can find. Although its looking less likely that we will be continuing with our Chinese application, we will definitely adopt again though :-)
Lots of love
Janet
xxxx

Cristina said...

Oh Janet - HUGS!!!! I know how hard the dratted wait is. I really pray that whatever you choose will work our for you and your family. Keep us posted!

Cristina xx

Janet said...

Thank you for that Cristina, I really appreciate it :-)
Love
Janet
xxx


OUR ETHIOPIAN ADOPTION TIMELINE


25th May 2009 - See New Child again & Court Date

23rd May 2009 - Fly back to Ethiopia

26th March 2009 - Fly to Ethiopia :-)

3rd March 2009 - Dossier Arrived at Orphanage

26th February 2009 - Dossier sent to Ethiopia

22nd December 2008 - Dossier back at DCSF

28th November 2008 - Certificate of Eligibility ISSUED

6th October 2008 - PASSED Approval Panel

7th July 2008 - Homestudy Update Started

28th Feb 2008 - Told LA we wished to change country

OUR CHINA ADOPTION TIMELINE

Formally withdrew from the China Adoption Programme 17th July 2008

LID (Logged in Date) with CCAA 16th August 2007

Documents to China 10th August 2007

Passed Approval Panel 5th March 2007

Homestudy started 6th June 2006

First Contact with our LA 1st Jan 2006