Wednesday, 24 November 2010

Little Prince is Processing a LOT

In the car earlier today, Little Prince turned the conversation to his Birth Mum as he has a lot recently. He is really grieving her loss and genuinely misses her. He told me all of this and then said "You're not really my family, I mean you are sort of, but not really" I wasn't hurt by this, as I know what he means. I just wish I could take his pain away or bear it myself, and I feel so helpless knowing that all I can do is listen and hold him as he goes through this. He did later in the evening decide that LMS, Drama Teen and Princess Lollipop are really his sisters though.

He also begged and begged to see his Birth Mum again. So I am going to get in touch with the Letterbox Co-ordinator, who meets Birth Mum each year to help her reply to our letters. She is probably in the best position to say whether or not Birth Mum is now able to put Little Prince's needs first and that face to face contact is conducted in Little Princes best interests. Me and Mr Messy discussed this, and we will have to think carefully after we have spoken to the Letter Box Co-ordinator, as if we allow a meeting to go ahead we are probably going to have to keep up with direct contact. Little Prince has been asking regularly and sincerely for a number of years now, and I think that given his background and the reasons he was taken into care it is something that could be beneficial for him. Although we also have to take into account his impulsivity and lack of self control, will he be able to resist telling Birth Mum his full name and where he lives, goes to school etc? Its very hard to be contemplating this, but if we are going to go ahead it would probably be best to start before he either hits puberty or around the time he moves to High School, as those times will be so much more disrupting to him than the average child.


Anonymous said...

:( Good luck figuring it out, and maybe this explains some of his recent behaviour? Give him a great big hug from his sister, and tell him that I'll always be his sister, no matter what :) Family isn't about blood or genes, it's so much more than that!


Janet said...

Thank you :-)
I think you're right and it is a part of the reason behind everything.
I'll give him your message tomorrow :-)


25th May 2009 - See New Child again & Court Date

23rd May 2009 - Fly back to Ethiopia

26th March 2009 - Fly to Ethiopia :-)

3rd March 2009 - Dossier Arrived at Orphanage

26th February 2009 - Dossier sent to Ethiopia

22nd December 2008 - Dossier back at DCSF

28th November 2008 - Certificate of Eligibility ISSUED

6th October 2008 - PASSED Approval Panel

7th July 2008 - Homestudy Update Started

28th Feb 2008 - Told LA we wished to change country


Formally withdrew from the China Adoption Programme 17th July 2008

LID (Logged in Date) with CCAA 16th August 2007

Documents to China 10th August 2007

Passed Approval Panel 5th March 2007

Homestudy started 6th June 2006

First Contact with our LA 1st Jan 2006