Sunday Visitors

As is there tradition, Mr Messy, Mrs LMS and Little Prince went off for their Boy Breakfast this morning. Little Prince managed to eat the same size breakfast size as Mr Messy, and finish first!! Which is good as he has hardly eaten for the rest of the day!

While they were out I vac'd up around Drama Teen and Princess Lollipop! Princess Lollipop very helpfully kept pointing out bits I'd missed!! Thank you dear!!

At lunchtime Mr Messy's youngest brother M, his girlfriend A and his three daughters arrived to visit. The girls are aged almost 12, 9 and 8 weeks :-) The eldest K played Lego with Little Prince in his room for ages, and was incredibly patient with him. She had gone through a long "sulky teenage" period, and she's not even a teen yet, but now seems to be back to her lovely self again :-) The middle girl J, played on the Wii for a while, then she, K and Little Prince played in the garden with Princess Lollipop. They seemed to have a lot of fun playing together out there, the new garden is fantastic and I'm so pleased we got it sorted out :-)

Me and Mrs LMS vied over who was going to hold 8 week old Baby F, and I didn't always win!! She is such a gorgeous, good natured, cuddly baby :-) I'm so lucky to have 3 such gorgeous new nieces :-) Mr Messy took some gorgeous pictures of his brother and his family, and some of Princess Lollipop holding Baby F :-)

Little Prince loved having his Aunt, Uncle and cousins over to play, but didn't cope very well when they had to leave. He wouldn't come and say goodbye and has been grumpy in the garden ever since. The visitors have worn Princess Lollipop out and we are trying hard to keep her awake until a sensible bedtime!

Saturday

This morning I had to try to persuade Princess Lollipop to have a bath, to make sure all the chlorine was out of her hair and off her skin. She was NOT happy about another bath, probably because of my stupidly childish behaviour last time, I'm thoroughly ashamed of myself for losing my temper and getting so wound up about the bath-time screaming, which hopefully means I won't do it again! Anyway once I'd persuaded her to actually get in the bath, she was fine, even when I was brushing through her conditioner slathered hair. Right up until the very last bits, and then she had obviously had enough and started to get upset and wriggly, but I stayed calm and finished her hair and she didn't get too worked up.

Princess Lollipop has decided she likes wearing her "special Princess nappies" (thank you for the suggestion Whatshername's Mum) which are actually potty training pull ups (the picture disappears if you wee in them). And she has worn the same ones with no accidents ALL DAY!!! I am so proud of her :-) She has really done well and seems to have got the hang of potty training almost instantly :-) I think after the nightmare I had with Little Prince (he still has bladder problems, so it was never ever going to be easy) I deserved an easy one to potty train - but I never imagined one quite this easy!!! We'll carry on with the "special Princess nappies" for the next week and see how she manages and then I'll have to buy her Princess knickers and see how she copes with them too. Wish me luck...

And another potty breakthrough - Little Prince is finally managing to stay dry overnight :-) He is OVERJOYED with himself :-) He says he has been dry for quite a few nights, but hasn't told me, I'm not sure if he thinks it was a fluke and he'll jinx it by saying something or what?! But I am so proud of him too :-) He has HATED, utterly H-A-T-E-D having to wear pull ups to bed, and feels he is somehow doing something wrong, or is stupid because he can't manage without them. This is despite constant reassurances both from me and from our GP and from his hospital Paediatrician, that it is NOT something he is doing or not doing, it is just his body has been slower to mature than average in this regard. Little Prince can't quite believe that it is really true, so he is choosing to wear pull ups over his underpants to bed, but as he has more and more dry nights I'm sure he'll stop needing the reassurance of doing that. This is a HUGE breakthrough for him, and such an enormous boost to his confidence and self esteem :-)

I was already planning to take Little Prince and Mrs LMS to the cinema to see Cars 2 today, and due to Little Prince's night time success we decided to treat the trip as a celebration. The film was awesome, it was very much a little boy film and suited Little Prince down to the ground. Although there was enough in there to keep me and Mrs LMS amused and entertained too :-) Once the film had finished I drove us to the American/Italian style restaurant we all like, and we phoned Mr Messy to come and meet us with Drama Teen and Princess Lollipop, so we could have a family celebration meal. We had a lovely time and I hope Little Prince realises how proud and happy we all are for him :-)

Another conversation with Little Prince

I'd forgotten this recent chat we had! Little Prince is upset because he doesn't feel very Arab, he says its really hard to feel Arab as we are all white, everyone at school is white and no one he knows is Arab like him. He had a very very similar comment to make about not feeling Muslim and not being a good Muslim.

I am going to have to make a lot more effort to get him connected to his birth culture and to learn more about Islam. Ramadan is approaching and I'm going to suggest that we all try fasting over a weekend, so that Little Prince can experience a little of what being a Muslim in Ramadan would feel like. I'll find one of his children's books on Islam so that we can read together about the purpose of fasting during Ramadan too. I'll also have to chat to my friend the Designer Children's Boutique owner as her husband is a Muslim, and see if Little Prince and Mr Messy can visit the Mosque with him and their boys. Although when I've suggested this to Little Prince he has been very resistant, I think he is worried he won't know what to do and he will make mistakes. He doesn't like to stand out and as being a Muslim is quite important to him, he doesn't want to appear foolish or silly.

Recent Conversations with Little Prince

Little Prince has been fairly quiet about his Birth Family for a while, but recently he has started talking about them again. He is sad that he has two birth siblings he has never met. He is jealous that two of his birth siblings get to see Tummy Mummy and he doesn't. He doesn't want to wait another 10 years (until he is 18) to meet Tummy Mummy, he misses her and he wants to see her sooner. When I get a quiet moment next week, and can get to the phone without him eavesdropping, which is almost impossible during the Summer Holidays I think I'm going to have to try getting in touch with the Social Workers again. Last time we spoke about him having direct contact with his Birth Mum the Social Worker advised us to wait as Birth Mum was going through some upheaval in her personal life, and the Social Worker wanted to be absolutely sure that Birth Mum was committed and capable of sustaining a long term direct contact relationship with Little Prince before we initiated anything. The Social Worker wanted us to wait until early next year to review the situation, but I don't think it will do Little Prince any good to make him wait that long, unless it is absolutely necessary. Hopefully if I manage to speak to the Social Worker I will be able to convince her of how important this is to Little Prince's well being and get her to review the situation sooner.

Another conversation we had was centred around "If you had millions and millions of Pounds what would you do?" Little Prince after buying himself a Bugatti Veyron, a very very fast and expensive car he is obsessed with, and a house with the family ghost was surprisingly altruistic for an 8 year old :-) He would pay for Mr LMS's Visa to come to the UK, and buy his flight tickets. He said he would also buy them a car, but would have to talk to Mr LMS to find out what kind of car he would like. Then he said "You know that party thing that Mrs LMS wants? Where she wants to get married again? (he means the renewal of vows Mrs LMS would like to save up to do) I'd pay for that, and even get them a cake." He wants to buy Drama Teen a VW Camper Van, as he remembered her saying she wanted one when they were chatting a while ago. He wants to buy Daddy a new camera, and a private jet so he can go and photograph where ever he wants. And he'd buy himself a camera and get Daddy to teach him how to use it. He is such a generous and thoughtful little boy and I need to remember moments like this when he is driving me insane with his ADHD!!!

Talking of his ADHD, is exactly what me and Little Prince were doing the other day! He was saying how unfair it is that he has so many problems and his friends at school don't. I agreed with him and sympathised. Then later on I tried to get him to see the positives that have come from some of his issues too, while being conscious of not belittling his feelings about how unfair it is, quite a balancing act!!! He seemed to get what I was saying and liked the fact that his ADHD gives him boundless energy, and that his Autism helps him see and remember the details about things that other people often overlook. Even his Dyspraxia has made him develop his determination, in his quest to write legibly.

Yet another chat we've had is about comparing his and Princess Lollipop's adoptions and Birth Families. Little Prince said that it wouldn't be fair if he met his Birth Family and Princess Lollipop found she couldn't meet hers, so he wouldn't meet his family so it wouldn't upset her. You have got to know Little Prince to know just how much he is sacrificing to even contemplate that scenario. Meeting his Birth Family is a huge huge deal to him, and to say he would give that up to not upset his sister is... well I don't even have the words to describe how big a deal that is. Wow! I am just in awe and humbled by his love for his sister. And I'm writing this with tears rolling down my cheeks. He is a special special little boy, and I am so privileged to be one of his mothers.

Friday

I had a nice leisurely start to the day, with no early morning errands or children to deliver, bliss :-) Drama Teen was going out with her Boyfriend to the cinema, but they were meeting each other on the bus into town, so there was no need for me to be involved in transportation. I did have a lunchtime optician's appointment, so I'd arranged to drop Princess Lollipop off with Mr Messy at OUR shop and take Little Prince with me. The Littlies are way too volatile together to have them at OUR shop for any length of time!!

I've been having difficulties with my new lenses since they were fitted last week, and driving yesterday just made it worse! I've had monster headaches (and I hardly ever get headaches!), its been almost impossible to keep both of my eyes focused at the same time and changing from focusing on something close to something far away has been really difficult too. The optician fiddled around with the strengths of the lenses and the new ones I've got now are tonnes better already :-)

After the optician I took Little Prince into town to have his passport photo taken. I didn't tell him until the last possible minute that was what we were doing!! Normally its a very bad idea to spring things on him as he doesn't cope with sudden changes/surprises easily, but in this instance I think it was the right thing to do. Little Prince hates having photos taken with flash (0ne reason he prefers Daddy to take his pictures, as Mr Messy hardly ever uses flash) and struggles to look people in the eye. I coaxed him by saying he wasn't looking the photographer in the eye, he was looking into the camera, and that seemed to help. I also held Little Prince's hand, off camera, so he stayed slightly calmer. When me and Princess Lollipop had visited the shop last week for our passport photos I'd mentioned Little Prince's difficulties and the photographer had remembered because he got the shots done as quickly as he could with as little interaction with Little Prince as he could manage. Altogether it worked perfectly :-) Little Prince now has passport photographs that meet the new stringent guidelines, and I can get all the passports sent off for :-)

I was so proud of how Little Prince coped, and took him out to his favourite cafe (no NOT McDonalds!!) for lunch :-) He had a BLT, without the L or T!! And was delighted that they had Elderflower juice on offer as he's been dying to try some :-) The lady serving us was very surprised at Little Prince's order, saying they hardly ever get someone his age asking for things like that!! And the verdict on Elderflower juice - wow that's yummy Mum :-)

After our lunch we wandered round "the art" as the cafe is in the local art gallery. Little Prince loves seeing the varying exhibitions that are displayed in there and usually has some very insightful comments to make about the exhibits :-) I love that fact about him, he is so full on and so "crazy" that most people would never imagine how he appreciates beauty and art, which is also kind of sad and their loss!!

Talking about beauty and Little Prince's appreciation of it, I'm not sure how this conversation came about, but Little Prince was telling me that he will always love H (the little girl in his class he has adored since nursery school) even though she doesn't love him (I can't help hating her a little for hurting my boy!!). When I tried to cheer him up by telling him he might meet someone even prettier and more wonderful as he grows up, he incredulously said "There couldn't be ANYONE as pretty as H!" One day he is going to make his partner very very happy, it might be the currently unappreciative H, or it might be someone else - but growing up now is that special someone who is just waiting to be loved and adored by my romantic 8 year old :-) And just for the record whoever he/she is - there is NO WAY they are good enough for MY Little Prince!!! Yes I am probably going to be the Mother In Law from Hell mwahahaha :-)

Thursday

I had an early start today, although not as early as Mr Messy who left to go to London before I woke up. As he was away I had to drive Mrs LMS to work, taking Princess Lollipop with us, which was the only reason I'd got up so early!! Even though I am not a morning person, that was the easy bit of the day!! As soon as I returned home chaos ensued!! Nothing seemed to go well and it was a fraught, stressful morning urgh! In the end, however, I managed to get everything ready and everyone in the car and set off!! We paused at the Post Office to post the designer bridal gowns back to the designer after Mr Messy's big shoot at weekend. We also had to stop by at the bank, so I could give Drama Teen some money, as she was having her restyled today. Then I dropped Drama Teen off at OUR shop and me and the Littlies set off on a a long drive to meet up with Baby Sis and her gorgeous little baby. It took about 2 hours to get to Baby Sis's house, and the drive wasn't too bad, especially as the Littlies watched a DVD each. It was a bit confusing in the front listening to Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Harry Potter in jarring stereo, but I can cope with that if it keeps the Littlies happy and amused for long drives!

Once we'd arrived at Baby Sis's house had a little break from the car, and Baby Sis's baby had eaten her lunch, we loaded the car back up with Littlies and set off again. This time we were heading for a shopping centre where we'd arranged to meet a fellow adopter we'd met up with in Ethiopia, and haven't seen since then. The family lives overseas, so it is difficult to get together, its not that we were avoiding them!! We met this adoptive family on our first trip to Ethiopia, when I travelled with Baby Sis, and we'd got on like a house on fire, probably due to our shared Northern Town roots, and both me and Baby Sis were very excited at the opportunity to see this friend again :-)

When we'd got together and were sat chatting Little Prince was talking to the other adopter's older two children, well to be honest Little Prince was doing a breathless non-stop monologue on Star Wars and the other children were listening, they probably couldn't get a word in!! The other adopter showed us pictures of her home, home town abroad and her Ethiopian children. I can't believe how much they've grown!! The other adopter said the same about Princess Lollipop, I guess two years makes a HUGE difference lol. We chatted for ages, before going for a walk round the Shopping Centre, Little Prince was still going and the other adopter's children were starting to look a little shell shocked!! After a lovely few hours together we said our goodbyes, fingers crossed its not another two years before we can get together again!!! Little Prince has mentioned the other two children a couple of times and wishes they could play/chat together more often :-)

Next we were dragged in the Disney Shop by Little Prince, not that it took much arm twisting to be honest lol. Surprisingly I ended up buying things for Little Prince (a cap and a fancy gadgety pencil case) rather than Princess Lollipop - its not often that way round in there!! We had a quick stop in the Croc Shop, but I didn't like the styles they had available in Little Prince's size, so we left without buying anything. Little Prince had been talking about the City Centre's Big Wheel, that we'd seen when we'd been chatting in the cafe, and both he and Princess Lollipop made it obvious they wanted to ride on it. Being a complete wuss about heights, I was extremely grateful when Baby Sis offered to take my Littlies on there, and let me stay on solid ground with Baby Niece :-) Thank you Baby Sis :-) Baby Niece wasn't as impressed with this arrangement and was crying, with big fat tears rolling down her cheeks by the time her Mummy returned :-( She would play with my hair, start to relax her head onto my shoulder, realise I didn't feel/smell/look like Mummy and jerk her head back up and cry, repeatedly. I'm so sorry for upsetting you Baby Niece :-( She settled almost straight back down once her Mummy reappeared, but was obviously getting fractious, as was Princess Lollipop, so we decided to call it a day and go back to the car.

Getting out of the car park was a trauma!! The exit ramp was like a helter skelter for cars!! And driving a bigger 4x4 style car, made me feel like I was going to fall off the edge the whole time, obviously I wasn't there were high concrete edges to the ramp, it just felt awful!! Baby Sis had told me how horrible the exit was when we were entering the car park, but I didn't realise just what she meant until I was driving it!!! We'll park somewhere else next time!!!

Princess Lollipop was fast asleep almost before we'd left the Town Centre, and Baby Niece was settling down too and might have fallen asleep if Little Prince hadn't decided to keep her amused!! He was so cute and sweet with her though, bless. I'm not sure that repeatedly banging his head on his own car seat because it made her laugh was a great idea though!!! We called in at a drive in place to get Little Prince something to eat, I thought Princess Lollipop would wake up to eat too but she didn't. She woke up just as we were about to drive away, and didn't seem that bothered so I decided to get her something later, or when we got home. When we were almost back at Baby Sis's house Baby Niece was getting more and more upset (she was hungry and tired) and started to cry :-( This upset both Little Prince and Princess Lollipop who had to put their hands over their ears, Princess Lollipop complaining "It too loudy!" Little Prince was upset that he couldn't cheer Baby Niece up, and was blaming himself for her being sad :-( It was quite a relief to arrive at Baby Sis's house. We only stopped long enough to all have a turn going to the loo, before setting off back home again, letting Baby Sis feed Baby Niece in peace - she was too distracted by her big cousins jumping around and making a lot of noise to feed!!

Once we were on the road again, I realised we hadn't got enough petrol to get us all the way home!! Trouble is I realised just as we sailed past the last garage!! After a few minutes of quiet panic I remembered a Supermarket Petrol Station just a little out of our way and headed there. I grabbed a drink and snack for the Littlies from the Petrol Station Shop before setting off again, hopefully they will both have eaten enough to go straight to bed once we get home. The drive was mostly plain sailing, except when Princess Lollipop dropped her almost empty crisps packet where no one could reach and then started to scream at the top of her lungs every few minutes for what felt like hours!! She can literally make an ear splitting noise - your ears ring afterwards!!! This was obviously very unpleasant while it lasted, especially for Little Prince sat next to her on the back seat!! The sooner we reach the end of these "Terrible Two Tantrums" the better!!!

When we got home I collapsed on the sofa, feeling absolutely exhausted!! I can't imagine how tired Mr Messy was after driving for twice as long as I did and he was still managing to be on his computer!! He explained that there was a big hoohaa going on at work and that to sort it out he will probably be flying out to the Indian office soon for a couple of weeks!! And depending on how that goes he might come home and then have to go to the Australian office!! Not really what my exhausted brain wanted to hear :-( Especially as the timing means he will probably be away before Little Prince goes back to school :-(

Wednesday

Mr Messy took Princess Lollipop to OUR shop with him all day, so I could just have Little Prince and an easier day to re-charge my batteries. In the morning me and Little Prince played on Lego Star Wars on the Wii. Well Little Prince played and I looked things up for him on the computer, so he could get further on in the game. Its not really cheating, as even though I could tell him what to do, or what to look for, he still had to actually manage to complete the missions/challenges. He did get a bit obsessed with it and it took a long time to persuade him to come off the game!! When I finally managed to get him to stop playing we went out to our local National Trust property for some fresh air and a play. There is a huge play park there and Little Prince loves going there and always finds a friend to play with, however, this time the children were all considerably younger than Little Prince and he had no one to play with, so he was quite sad and didn't enjoy himself as much as usual. We had a wander round the huge gardens, and it was lovely, especially in the wooded areas out of the direct sun where it was cooler!! We picked Mrs LMS up after work and came home, to find Mr Messy still wasn't back with Princess Lollipop and Drama Teen. He took them out for some tea, so that he could keep them out later, to give me as much time as he could - thank you so much Mr Messy, you are a star :-)